Found this in my e-mail this morning from a "friend" and can't resist passing it on - with feeling - - -
A plane was taking off from Kennedy Airport. After it reached a comfortable cruising altitude, the captain made his usual announcement over the intercom.
"Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. Welcome to Flight Number 293, nonstop from New York to Los Angeles. The weather ahead is good and therefore we should have a smooth and uneventful flight. Now sit back, relax and..... OH MY GOD!!!!!"
There was a loud silence throughout the entire plane. For about 20 seconds, everyone sat frozen in their seats, staring up at the intercom speaker on the wall. Then, the captain came back on the intercom ....
"Ladies and Gentlemen, I am so sorry if I scared you earlier, but while I was talking, the flight-attendant brought me a cup of hot coffee and she accidentally spilled it into my lap. You should see the front of my pants!"
An old man sitting somewhere near the back shouted, "That's nothing ... You should see the back of mine!"