In Reply to: help please!! posted by ella_oz on Wednesday, 21. September 2005 at 14:59 Bali Time:
who WAS young once as you also were <LOL> Many years ago when I was in my late teens & early 20's I travelled the world pretty extensively.A lot of the time when I came home from one of my many OS trips I HAD meet someone special who I was going to keep in touch with forever & was going to be THE special one.Naturally any of these guys were NOT suitable as far as Mum would have considered ideal <VBG> it was going to take someone really special to be good enough for MY Mother's daughter ! My Mum was clever enough NOT to get involved.She refused to comment even when I asked her opinion - she WAS & still is a very clever woman <LOL>
In spite of many years of travelling in my youth THE special man in my life for over 20 years now turned out to be someone who lived only about 20 minutes from where I lived -who had a very simialr upbringing & similar family to mine - who I met in my mid 20's through a community service group - after I had done most of my travelling & I can't imagine my life without him these days ! BTW - my MUM absolutely adores my husband & he IS the son she never had.
I may be criticised for being so blunt but it IS really hard as Mum to stand back when you feel your kids are doing something that may NOT (or may be ) wrong for them BUT speaking from a LOT of experience the MORE you say & try to be involved - the more your young lady will dig her heels in & resent you.You will be way better off NOT to get too involved.As you said you DO know your daughter well - you have raised her to be a bright young woman no doubt.Trust in how she feels at the moment .IF it's NOT meant to work,it won't.
There are many holiday romances that HAVE worked out - including some special regular forumites- so don't think it's impossible.
One thing I always try to remember is a saying that goes something along the lines - " If you love something set it free - if it comes back,it was & always will be yours- if it never returns,it never was yours to begin with"
Because of my own daughter & her life - My heart really goes out to you,I can really understand what you are feeling.If you want to talk more send me an email.